I had a dream last night I was bit by one.
! ! !
In my dream, I was in one of the meadows in Prospect Park. It was a sunny weekend day, and there were a lot of people around. I was with some friends but I don't remember who. You forget these kinds of things when you get bit by a tiger.
Suddenly people start screaming in the park. There's commotion afoot. I look around, and theres an orange thing running around and people in jumpsuits trying to wrangle it. It's running fast, and on all fours. It's a tiger.
People run and scream and dart every which way. The tiger is running in big spirals around the meadow. I don't know what to do or where to go. I feel like I'm stuck in the ocean and there's a crazy shark. Only it's not a crazy shark. It's a tiger.
The tiger is closer to me now and I'm running from it, but it can run faster than me and it always makes it to wherever in the meadow I run before me. It's not running after me per se, me and the tiger just want to be in the same place at the same time it seems. Anyway, now the tiger is like fifteen feet from me. It's close as shit. I back up slowly from it, and it darts at me. The people in jumpsuits can't do shit. I brace myself for the tiger coming at me and put my hands up. The tiger bites me in the wrist.
The tiger's mouth stays on my wrist, its teeth IN my wrist, for a long time. It hurts but it's not as bad as I thought it'd be. I thought my wrist would come the fuck off, but it doesn't. Also there's not really any blood. The tiger chews a bit on the wrist and then hurries off. Then the tiger comes back and does it again.
He bites my wrist again, same shit, not so bad, not that it doesn't hurt, it's just not so bad. Then the tiger runs off again and this time it's wrangled. I walk away holding my wrist, which is now bleeding slightly and swollen, and go to a movie. A movie about nature.
I'm in a movie theater with a tiger-bitten wrist watching a nature documentary when I wake up.
A FUCKING TIGER BIT ME
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